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What Can You Do Now to Prepare Your Children for the Arrival of Their Younger Sibling?

By Rachel Lacourciere, edHelperBaby

  What Can You Do Now to Prepare Your Children for the Arrival of Their Younger Sibling?
           Much of your preparation for the arrival of a new sibling to the family will depend upon the age of your older children.  However, there are few general things that you can try while you are pregnant to lay the foundation and prepare any child for the arrival of a younger sibling:
  • Discussion - Once the mother begins to show, take the time to discuss the changes with your children.  It may be harder for them to grasp if they can not see any visual changes.  Yet once they begin to see their mother's belly getting bigger, they have a frame of reference for understanding that their younger sibling is growing inside of Mommy.
  • Baby doll - Buy a baby doll and give it to your older children to care for.  They can learn to feed a bottle to the baby, diaper the baby, hold the baby, and tuck the baby into the crib or bassinet.
  • Mother's Helper/Babysitter - Enlist someone to help you out for a couple hours during the week.  It will give your children a "special" person dedicated to giving them individual attention.  This way when the baby arrives, your helper can continue to come and keep the regular routine the children are already used too.
  • Prenatal Visits - Try bringing your children to a regularly scheduled prenatal visit.  This will give them an opportunity to hear the baby's heartbeat and hear you speak to the doctor about the new baby.
  • Sharing - Having other children around from the neighborhood can help introduce the idea of sharing a child's own toys-- a skill that will be valuable as the younger sibling gets older.
  • Nursery - Introduce the new nursery to your children.  Make sure you leave the door open and welcome your children to explore it prior to the arrival of the baby.  You can even have your children help you when you begin setting up the nursery.  The more they can be a part of the process, the easier it may be for them to accept their new sibling.

   

  My Own Experience
           Since our son will be approximately 29 months when our daughter is born in 2 months, we started the process of introducing him to the concept of his sister a few months ago.  At first we would talk about the baby, but he really didn't seem to absorb any of it.  However, as my belly began to grow and become more noticeable, he started being able to answer questions about the baby.  I can now ask him where the baby is, and he will point to my belly.  Additionally, once we found out we were having a girl and had picked a name for her, we began asking him who his sister is and he'll now answer, "Katherine."  He also refers to our daughter's future room as "Katherine's room."  While we know he doesn't completely grasp that a little baby will be added to our household soon, we do know that once she is here and we are referring to her as "Katherine," it will make more sense and will hopefully not be as much of a surprise for him.       

       Additionally, once we began setting up the nursery, we had him in the room with us getting comfortable to its new setup and the idea that it would be used for his little sister.  We felt this part of the process was imperative, as in our case, we are reusing the furniture that used to be in his room (crib, changing table, and so forth) and got him a new "big boy" bedroom set.  Obviously, he recognized his old furniture, and when he first saw the crib assembled in the new nursery, he wanted to get in it and go to sleep.  Yet it didn't take him long to tell us that he was too big for the crib. We explained the baby will be sleeping in the crib while he now sleeps in his big boy bed.  He also loves going on errands with Mommy to get things for the nursery.  The other day he helped me go on a scavenger hunt through town for a clock for his sister, which he must have reiterated to at least ten other shoppers that morning.       

       Furthermore, I have hired the girl who lives next door to come over twice a week for two hours at a time.  Although I am still home, it gives me a much needed break (since I get tired so easily anymore!) and gives my son an opportunity to have someone fully dedicated to him without distraction.  She plays with him, takes walks with him, and just gives him some extra special attention.  I plan to continue having her come after the arrival of the baby.  This way, although many things are going to change within the house and disrupt what our son currently knows as his daily routine, that time with her will remain unchanged and consistent for him.       

       The only other thing I am going to try with my son is the concept of a baby doll.  After doing the research for this article (and convincing my husband that it was OK!), it seems many people have had a lot of success with giving their child a baby doll to care for, just as my son will see me caring for our daughter.  He doesn't currently have any dolls of his own, but he loves playing with our neighbor's dolls, so it might be the perfect way to introduce how he can help Mommy when his sister is here!

   


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